Hwk 56

My revised question: Why do some people care more about the approval from others like family and friends instead of their own approval?

Part 1:

1. Do you feel closer with your family or friends? In what ways do you feel you are closer to them?
2. Who do you rely on the most, and what causes you to do so?
3. How do you know when you have gotten the approval of others? How does this make you feel?
4. Do you ever approve of yourself, or do you let the approval of others take over?
5. Do you feel comfortable when getting the approval you need from others, or do you just do it to make them happy, but you suffer?
6. What is the furthest you have gone to receive the approval you need from others or yourself? Did you feel comfortable with this decision?

Part 2:

Michelle:
Q: Do you feel closer with your family or friends? In what ways do you feel you are closer to them?
A: I feel like I am closer to both my family and friends in different ways. My family comes first obviously, because they know me the best and they had to put up with me my whole life. They are always there for me no matter what. I am close to my friends as well because I am able to make more connections with them. I am able to discuss different topics about life with them that I usually wouldn’t be able to discuss with my family.

Q: Do you ever approve of yourself, or do you let the approval of others take over?
A: That’s a hard question, because no one wants to come out and say they want the affirmation of others. But for me I do stuff for the approval of those who influence me, but sometimes I want the approval of myself as well, so I can also have a say. My thoughts are always included in my final decision.

Q: What is the furthest you have gone to receive the approval you need from others or yourself? Did you feel comfortable with this decision?
A: I have felt once in my life that I have done something that was uncomfortable, or not who I was to please another. I would say labeling also has to do with approval from others, for example my family labels me as their good and responsible daughter. But I know it’s for my own good to succeed in life.

Arden:
Q: Do you feel closer with your family or friends? In what ways do you feel you are closer to them?
A: Most of the time I feel closer with my friends. I can tell them things I do not always feel I can tell my parents. It just seems like my friends would be ok with something that my parents wouldn’t be.

Q: Who do you rely on the most, and what causes you to do so?
A: I rely on different people for different things. Mostly though I would say I rely on my friends and my sister. My friends and my sister are people that I can talk to who won’t judge me and be supportive and be there in good and not so good times.

Q: Do you ever approve of yourself, or do you let the approval of others take over?
A: I care about what other people think yes. My friends opinion count more than other peoples. But overall I think it’s important that a person likes who they are themselves not based off of what other people say or want.

Aneeqa:
Q: Do you feel closer with your family or friends? In what ways do you feel you are closer to them?
A: Yeah...I feel like I am close with both of them because both my family and friends are a part of my life and make me who I am. If I had to choose I would say that my family is closer in a way because they are there for me at anytime I need them. In an official way, friends are important and closer as well because they always consolidate me in both good and bad times. I love both, my family and friends very much.

Q: Do you ever approve of yourself, or do you let the approval of others take over?
A: Oh, of coarse...I approve of myself if I feel like I am making the right decision for myself. I don’t think people should only try to receive the approval from others because then they have no right to live their own way. They should always stand up for what they feel is right, and they shouldn’t let the approval from others get in their way, which will cause them to make the wrong decision.

Q: Do you feel comfortable when getting the approval you need from others, or do you just do it to make them happy, but you suffer?
A: I feel much comfortable with my own approval first, because if I don’t get the approval I need from others on a decision I am making based off of my approval, I will force them to agree with me giving them reasons to do so. I guess that’s just me though, since I am a pretty straightforward person…


Part 3:

I would say that most of the responses I got on my questions were how I would reply to someone with the same questions. For me my family always comes first before my friends, but my friends are people that I would have a hard time to live without, so I need them to be there as well. I guess in our age we need support from our friends because they are struggling with the same difficulties we all go through. Most of the answers I got on my questions were expected, but there were times where people had different say. Some people felt they were closer with their families, while others said that they were closer with their friends. A lot of people said they felt closer with their family since they are there for them at all times; I would agree with them as well. Connecting my responses to my research question: Why do some people care more about the approval from others like family and friends instead of their own approval? I would say it’s because we are not aware that we have a say as well. We live in a culture that makes us feel that our approval is nothing when compared to the approval of others.

Part 4:

Whose approval matters to you the most; your family, your friends, or yourself?